VeronicaAnne on Xanga

Saturday, 21 November 2009

:( or :)

I'm feeling a little blue. Well Joe, sent me a text after a big fight saying he wants to fix things, and that he just needs time to think, so that made me extremely happy, because i havent heard words like that from him in a long time. But today, yeah i get no texts, and im trying to keep my mind from wondering to what he did last night.

I have decided, i have no clue who i am, and i really need to step away from everything and figure this out. I am so mature now, and everyone notices. Last year, i was crazy, and bubbly. Now I dont really act like a cheerleader, out of cheerleading. I am bubbly, and super outgoing. Im not loud anymore, and im not obnoxious, and that draw real, chill people to me. I laugh at people who thing that they are actually cool, and chill, and it sort of makes me want to smack them outside the head, because they look rediculus. I have learned to make myself happy, i just need something new, a new hobby, hair style, ect. I am going to the gym with sam now at chin, and my dad at ballys. My godmother said she would pay for all of my cheerleading expenses. My friend is going to dye my hair :) I have some pictures of how i want to look. My friend has the same hair lol. Shes the one with the blonde hair.

So basically, i want blonde highlights or just golden blonde, with some chocolate brown under, and chocolate brown little streaks.

but yeah you get the point. I love the winter season. Its such a good season. But i wish i could spend more time with my lover around this time, but he refuses. It really sucks. but ill get through it. xox Veronica

Monday, 16 November 2009

First post!

Today i stayed home from school. I got home Sunday night after the pats game at like 12:30, and was way too tired to go to school. My aunt took me to get new shoes, BOOTS! :), and i got into a huge conflict with a certain someone. When i get committed to things, i stay committed, and i refuse to leave, or give up.. (Stubborn!). But i know whats right, and i know what i have to do in order to make someone happy. And thats the biggest thing i want. It would be so nice to hear, "Your right, your different :)." So i am making it my goal to hear those words. I used to be all over boys, all i would talk about was boys. But now i only focus on one. It wasnt very hard for me to do, but i made it harder then i should have been. Im not sure why i did that either, it was probably just my dignity and pride, but whatever, im over that. Now i need to focus on making myself a better person. I know i already am attractive physically and personality wise (No cockyness), but i need to focus on being the perfect girlfriend, and giving myself the highest standards there are. I mean who wants to date someone who is an emotional wreck, and messes up all the time? No one that wants a long relationship does. So yeah, im going to gain that and hopefully not only be attractive at first, but attractive still for the years of the relationship to come. Thats my goal by the end of the year. I need to focus, and be the best. If i want to be the best, i can definately be the best, i just need the effort, and mindset. If my mindset is good then im good :). FOR PROVING THEM WRONG!! :) YES!